In less than 2 months time I will be sending my 2 oldest babies, Alyssa 5 & Aidan 4, into the hands of the public school system. While this alteration in my current life causes me discomfort I have pledged to be undaunted, to actually use this experience to explore avenues of my own personal wants and dreams. I've decided to write a book. That's right, a book, a novel, one of surreal dream-like origin set in the actual every day reality. I will come here often, asking of you opinions on certain aspects, asking for you to assist in my work in progress. As if we, together, whom ever you may be, will write this together, will work unanimously to bring to life the dream I've selfishly held hostage for many years. My dearest, Lottie, I fear that most of this work will fall on your shoulders, for your honesty and refreshing approach to my writing is exactly what I need. In the chance that my novel ever makes it to print, it will be published as Authors: Jessie Shales & Lottie Essig. My dear friend, I could think of no greater honor than to share this with you. I love you for your many amazing qualities, but most for being simply you, for being there with me when I lost the MOST important person in my life when no others understood or cared too the pain I was being suffocated by. You didn't owe me anything, barely knew me, yet we had our love for him in common and you used that common ground to offer me a friendship I need more than I even realized myself. Thank you! I love you! And now that I've said all of that, you'll definitely help me with your literary genius... lol... how could you not :) I have the foundation for the novel, yet will be using my dreams as a guide. I've always been what some call a "Lucid Dreamer".. very clear, lifelike dreams, very surreal Dali-Like, often duressed with situations beyond my understandings. In these dreams I never choose to wake but allow them to run course, other times I have the ability to alter the dream and make it what I want. Always waking feeling as if I actually lived the events in actual time. These dreams so real... touch, smell, sounds all experienced as if they actually took place. I've woken smelling burning, flowers, the tickle of a feather still on my cheek.... never seen this as anything more than intriguing, yet now I feel like these experiences are my gift to write the best damn novel ever. And with my new found time... I will be accomplishing my goal. I've seen my readers have climbed from a humble viewer ammounts to a couple hundred, that alone reinstills my belief that writing, my writing, is something of interest, something to nurture. Tonight... I begin :)
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